Blog Challenge: I Haven't Done One of These in a While.

The Challenge: If you could dedicate a day to a good cause, what would it be, and what would the day consist of? 

To answer this, I thought for about ten minutes straight about what means a lot to me. The first thing I thought about was my family, but then I realised that there's already Mother's Day and Father's Day, and well we really don't need another commercial holiday. I considered a lot of things after that - Nerdfighteria, a Harry Potter day, a day of the dead sort of thing to commemorate those who have left us, plus loads more, but none of them seemed possible and most of my ideas had been done already, so I guess they were never my ideas anyway. But thinking more about what it means to be me, I recalled this photo, which coincidentally I posted on Facebook just hours previously. 

In the files on my computer, I called this photo "Vital to life". I know that I've gone on and on throughout various posts on this blog about how much I value individuality and how nobody else's opinion should matter as long as you're happy with yourself, so I'm not going to do yet another version here. But this picture really does mean a lot to me. First off, I love the design, and the image itself has beautiful meaning even without the quote. I don't want to ramble on about this, so I'm going to leave this explanation here and let you make up your own opinion on it, and get on with my challenge. 

My day would be a charity day, orientated to get people to admit who they really are inside. If an old woman wanted to be a dancer for a day, the charity would find a way to make it happen for her. If a person wants to come out to the world, this would be an ideal opportunity. They could just wake up in the morning and be themselves. In schools and workplaces, people would wear what they want to wear, be exactly who they want to be, and if they want to carry on being that person forever, then that's who they'll be. I know there are so many flaws in this plan, but this is just what I'd want in an ideal world. I want a world where people can be who they want to be without being judged. 

The following song seemed fitting. Either way, there's always time for a bit of REM.

The Bermudez Triangle by Maureen Johnson

The Bermudez Triangle is going straight onto my shelf of brilliant books. I've already expressed my love for Maureen Johnson in general, and with every book of hers I read, I fall a little bit further in love with her, in a brilliant kind of way.

Based around a year in the lives of three teenage girls who've been friends since preschool, it's a totally relatable novel. The characters are fantastic; they are so easy to get a feel for, they're funny in their own ways, and like most teenagers, their emotions are all over the place. It's well written, truly enchanting, and if I could have read the entire thing without putting it down I would have done so a hundred times by now.

Blurb: "Nina Bermudez, who TiVos every episode of Trading Spaces because watching people rip down bad decorations soothes her. Avery Dekker, who worships Jack Black but has learned to play Billy Joel's Piano Man by heart just so that she can hate it in detail. Melanie Forrest (a.k.a Mel), who inspires guys to develop instantaneous, epic crushes - the kind that cause them to want to iron their clothes and listen to the lyrics of slow songs. Lifelong best friends Nina, Avery and Mel fave their first separation the summer before their senior year, when Nina attends a ten week program at Stanford. But how much can happen in ten weeks? Plenty, it seems. Nina finds herself blindsided by Steve, the adorable ecowarrior down the hall. Too bad he lives in Oregon and she's from upstate New York. When the Stanford trip ends, she has to wait 8,736 hours before she can see him again. At least she'll soon he reunited with Mel and Avery. But Nina isn't the only one whose life was turned upside down in ten weeks. While Nina was gone, Mel had her first real kiss. With Avery."

This book touches on a lot of issues which nearly every teenager will go through at least some of - friendship, love, sexuality, parents, work... It's almost a guide to curving teen years, except Mel, Avery and Nina are hardly experts in these fields. I really loved every word of it, plus the cover on my edition is waterproof too, making it instantly more awesome. I'd rate it 7/10 and highly recommend it.

Interpreting Lyrics: The Sound of Silence

Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence

In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence

"Fools", said I, "You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed
In the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls"
And whispered in the sounds of silence

Written and performed by Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel respectively.

We'll start with verse two, because most of the first is in the present tense, so we'll be going back to it at the end. 

The restless dream refers to being in a world where everything is happy and you don’t know what is going on in real life, but it’s restless because there is a part of you that knows something is wrong and that bit just won’t shut up. The narrow street of cobblestone is narrow because there isn’t room to think, and it’s uneven ground that he’s finding hard to walk down. Nobody else is coming down this road because he’s the only person who can see this street and can fit down it, but then the light comes in, and underneath the halo of a street-lamp (a holy light), and under that light he sees a man less fortunate than him he tries to turn his collar to it so it can’t affect him as he chooses to ignore him, because nobody cares what anybody else thinks - society is about keeping yourself to yourself - so the man probably wouldn't let him help him if he tried. But then his eyes are stabbed by the flash of a neon light as he feels the pain of knowing that he’s been lied to all of his life, and it hurts to know that he’s been kept away from the truth. The flash of the neon light gives him the enlightenment and the realisation that life isn't as it seems and that it isn't all happy. If we think of the rest of the people as living in their own little silent bubbles, too afraid to talk to each other and not caring for each other’s opinions, then  when his enlightenment ‘splits the night’, it pops the bubble of silence which surrounds him and makes him see how unhappy people truly are.  We see the silence as some kind of entity which is controlling the people, stopping them from communicating and isolating them from society. Paul Simon here becomes the only man who sees past the silence and is now in control of his own life and destiny.

The ‘naked light’ refers to the same stage of realisation, but it’s clear to him now because he can see what’s going on.  The ten thousand people that he sees are the people being controlled, who are still wrapped in their own silent bubbles, talking without speaking and hearing without listening because they’re not realising the actual depth of their words, not seeing the consequences of their actions and words, not realising the misconception they have been led to believe by the silent entity. They are so controlled by the silence that they don’t think their own thoughts, cannot say what they truly believe. The fact that he says they’re 'writing songs that voices never share' shows that they are starting to think that something’s not right in their society but at the same time, part of their mind is not their own. They’re being controlled so strongly that they can’t think for themselves, its not that they’re choosing not to believe the truth, but more that they physically can’t as they’ve been brainwashed by the silence and they daren’t do anything other than what the silence has told them to do, as it says, 'and no one dared disturb the sound of silence'. If the people tried to escape, they could potentially run away from the problem but they daren’t because there would be no one to guide them as everyone thinks the same, no one could save them. The only person who believes differently to everyone else is Paul Simon.

Simon says ‘Fools, you do not know silence like a cancer grows’. He refers to cancer as a parasite, it will kill them because it gets into their system and grows bigger and bigger until it destroys everything. The silence will infect them and control them so much that it kills them slowly - they need to escape while they can. He says ‘hear my words that I might teach you and take my arms that I might reach you’ in a bid to save the people, telling them that if they listen to him and reach out to him then he can save them, pulling them away from the silence and taking them to a better place where they can be their own people. But his words fall like silent raindrops, showing that the people ignored him, as the silence has already infected them so badly that they cannot focus on what he is saying and do not believe him. The words are falling heavy as the raindrops fall a long way, into 'the wells of silence', the wells that have been created by the silent entity of thoughts of the people who tried to escape, and all of those thoughts are pooling in a well, a well which fills and never drains, but a well provides sustenance where it cannot otherwise be found, so the well is holding the wishes to escape and preserving them, building up a reserve, and the well could potentially eventually create a light. But for the time being, they will echo; hitting things but never entering them, trapped in an enclosed space, and like every echo, it has the potential to fade away into nothing.

'The people bowed and prayed to the neon god they made' refers to the idea that the silence planted, and they have relied on so much that it has become somewhat of a god to them, something for them to worship and pray to. The sign is flashing in their peripheral vision, trying to pull them away to the light, it is warning them that there is something better that is just within their reach, but it is in the places that they never look, hidden. It is saying that 'the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls,' because the things that are most important are the things that we usually walk past without thinking about, so the messages written on the walls of the subway by people that nobody pays any attention to because they aren’t behaving in a normal fashion, but the things that they aren’t noticing are written by prophets, prophets other than the silent entity who control them, prophets with the actual right idea who could save them all. But of course nobody listens to them. They're the crazy people who write on subway walls. But the words are also 'whispered in the sounds of silence', which I assume is a sign that the silent entity is breaking down. 

And so we return to the first verse. The first line, 'hello darkness my old friend, I've come to talk to you again' are the only two lines in the present tense, and personally I think them to be possibly the most important ones. Basically what I believe him to be saying when he says this is that after all of the above has happened, after he's noticed it all, what he's saying in the whole first verse is that he's gone back to the darkness and confronting it and the silence about it. The whole of the rest of the song is what he's saying to the darkness. He's telling it that a vision 'softly creeping' planted a vision which 'still remains within the sound of silence', then goes on throughout the song to talk about this vision, and how he knows how they're controlling people and that he's spreading the word. This gives the last line a lot more power, which says that the words of the prophets are also being 'whispered in the sounds of silence', which I take to mean that he's planted the seed of doubt in the brains of the silent entity, and they're beginning to doubt their power. At the risk of sounding like a cliché, it is the sign of hope for humanity on the horizon.

Inferred by Rach and Dev. 

Ah.

I have a maths exam in three days which I am in no way prepared for. So what am I doing? Well, I'm not doing my biology homework, which I should be, and I'm not revising maths like I definitely should be. I'm.reading and regretting being such a magnet for procrastination.

"It is the quality of one's convictions which determines success, not the number of followers."

~ Remus Lupin - Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2.

The Cuteness Attraction

Watch "Cute OVERLOAD: The Ultimate Concern Edition" on YouTube

The above video needs to be watched before any attempt to read this post is made. I don't care if you don't like the people that made it, just watch it.

Done? Good. The above video is probably my favourite video on YouTube, ever. It's entertaining, it raises points which made me think enough to write this post (this is my third attempt now because every time I turn the screen off it erases everything) and have you SEEN how cute it is? Not just Henry, but the relationship between the father and son. It's a relationship I'm personally familiar with, as I have a great relationship with both of my parents, and yet it seems so rare nowadays what with all of the media coverage of abusive and neglecting parents. I'm so happy for Henry and John, because Henry will grow up with a parent who noms him and showers him with love and affection, whereas there are some parents who leave their children defenceless at a young age, with no money or food. Thankfully, the vast majority of parents worldwide make a conscious effort to make their primary concern the wellbeing of their children.

I always try to make sure that my parents know that I love and appreciate them and everything they've done for me over the years, because I find it difficult to comprehend how many people don't appreciate their parents at all, and take them for granted. My dad saved my life when I was a few days old by freeing my airways when I stopped breathing. I have no recollection of this event at all, and yet I feel like I owe him something for that. Of course I'll always be in the debt of my parents. Hardly anybody seems to realise that as John mentioned, when a child is born, something clicks inside the parents that makes them want to change nappies and give up half of their income to feed another mouth. Without our parents, we just wouldn't last. They go out to work for us, they make sacrifices for us, they feed, clothe and advise us. In many respects, they tend to be completely selfless for our sakes. We need them, and most of us are lucky to have even one of them.

Family should always be a primary concern, or at least one of them, among world preservation for the protection of our species and the planet. I'd love to love in a world where money didn't exist. In my perfect world without money, there'd be far fewer fights and wars, nobody would go hungry and everything would be shared out equally. Of course I realise that this wouldn't actually work out. We'd end up resorting back to the world where the fittest survive, basically it would be a devolution. We would devolve into a species where the strongest got the best shelter and the first pick of the food. The old and weak would starve, get kicked out of their homes and die. The strongest would battle for the highest ranks, basically rendering us to some primeval, inhuman species. They say that money is the root of all evil but really it's the root of all good, too. Financial stability is high on my list of wishes for the future, because the world really wouldn't work without money, and you can't survive out there without it. Yet another reason I'm very grateful for my working parents.

I think I love this video because it makes me happy. If makes me grateful for what I have, and yes; the cuteness overload is definitely a scoring factor. Henry is cute, John is cute in a weird way, and the interaction between them is definitely cute. There's also something about this which really makes me want to become a writer, just so I can work from home really, and wear pyjamas well into the middle of the day.

Let It Snow by John Green, Maureen Johnson and Lauren Myracle

Let It Snow is a book co-written by three brilliant authors. Split into three sub-stories, each author wrote an individual story, with characters and events interlinking to help each story along.

"Sparkling white snowdrifts... Beautiful presents wrapped in ribbons, and multicoloured lights glittering in the night through the falling snow. A Christmas Eve snowstorm transforms one small then into a romantic haven, the kind you only see in movies. Well, kinda. After all, a cold and wet hike from a stranded train through the middle of nowhere would not normally end with a delicious kiss with a charming stranger. And one would think that a trip tp the Waffle House through four feet of snow would lead to love with an old friend. Or that the way back to true love starts with a painfully early morning shift at Starbucks. Thanks to three of today's best-selling teen authors - John Green, Maureen Johnson and Lauren Myracle - the magic of the holidays shines on these hilarious and charming interconnected tales of love, romance and breathtaking kisses."

The plot is surprisingly easy to follow,and it's easy to become attached to these reliable yet humerous characters. There's not really a lot to say about this book without giving away plot points, so I'll keep it simple; it's a brilliant read. I'd recommend it, especially around Christmas, and so I give it a rating of 6/10.

Argh.

I don't know what's wrong. Nothing is particularly bad, but right now all I want to do is swear at people who piss me if even in the smallest ways. I'm getting really irritated over nothing. I'm being lazy, I know I'm going to regret it, yet I don't give a shit. All I want to fucking do is swear and chill, because this isn't me and I'm kinda scared that this is is becoming me. I hate ignorant people, and yes I can class myself in there sometimes. I'm fucking trying to be a good person and a decent student, but it's just not fucking happening tonight, is it? My guitar's out of tune but I can't play anything anyway. My whole being is telling that I can't he fucking arsed to get up and do something with my life, except this one tiny piece of my brain that's able to be rational, and making me blog to get it out. But to be honest, I've been writing this post for five probably ten minutes now and I don't fell any difference at all. I want to be one or the other, an idiot so I can hate myself or rational so I can try to deal with this. I want to fucking feel something instead of being stuck in my head with the conflict and the hell.

I'm going in the shower. Maybe that'll help me decide.

Pancake Day

Today is the day we celebrate the memory of all the pancakes that died for our sins.

God bless the pancake.

Hi, My Name is Rach, and I'm a Bookaholic.

As you may be aware, this year I have set myself the target of reading 50 books before the New Year's countdown. I'm going to review every book I read, good or bad, although I can't promise I'll finish all of the ones I start.

I know a lot of people don't like reading, which I accept straight off, but I just have to argue when people say that reading is boring. For me, there is no better way to relax than with a good book. Of course what defines a good book differs with the genre, but obviously clichés are a no-go, so overdone themes like vampires, werewolves and zombies are generally something to avoid, as much potential as they may have, which is usually nothing. But once I find a good book, a series or just an author in general, it's a good idea, especially for the purposes of this project, to stick to it. As I've found, John Green and Maureen Johnson are extremely good authors, and as I've read pretty much all of JG's work, I'm aiming to do the same for MJ.

A good book relaxes me. There seems to be something so beneficial about just sitting down and escaping life for a little while, and nothing compares to that for me. I'd rather read than watch most of the things on TV. I'd rather snuggle up in bed and read myself to sleep every night than go to parties every night. I'd also rather read than do homework, which I guess is where the positive aspects end, at least in respect for my grades.

I'm not sure what the exact purpose of this project is, but certainly some of the outcomes include building my knowledge on great literature, fleshing out my bookcase, and getting back into the phase where I read and I read, and I just form a little bubble where nothing else matters. It's ridiculously brilliant for me, on some levels. Of course I'm still going to be social. I'm not stupid enough to sacrifice everything for this - I'm just doing something that I enjoy. 

I do worry sometimes, that I'm too oblivious for my own good. I'm really bad at taking hints, assessing social situations and talking to people. I'm drawing back into my shell and although I'm trying my hardest to understand, you've just got to take your time with me, and I'm truly sorry for the inconveniences and if you ever feel like snapping at me, I won't blame you, in fact I'll probably learn from it. I completely understand if you feel that I'm not capable of understanding your situation and sometimes I give my opinion when you really don't want to hear it, but just know that I'm always here, always willing to listen and help to guide. I love you dudes, and if you just open up, maybe you'll see that I'm not that bad once I know what's going on. I might be biased and as I learned tonight, unhelpful, but I'm trying. I just can't escape my bloody stupid head.

Just a Quickie...

I know I don't have to blog on Sundays, but I like to. I had one planned out, too, I just didn't get around to actually writing it. It's a shame really because I've been planning it since Saturday morning. Anyway...

I have an interview at Ridgewood sixth form tomorrow which I'm really nervous about. I've never had an interview before, and I can tell I'm not going to do well. Panic, I can assure you, is a certainty.

In other news, this morning/afternoon (it was morning to me), mum and I devised an excellent recipe for a banana milkshake. For two servings, it's one banana, chopped into a blender, quite a lot of milk, around half a pint or something, I'm not good with measurements, and where most people would add vanilla icecream, we added strawberry cheesecake flavour. It was definitely the best milkshake I've ever had, and I really, really want another one. It'd be interesting to try it with actual strawberry cheesecake as opposed to the icecream, but either way, it's incredible. You get this amazing balance of strawberry and banana, with the irresistible added bonus of the biscuit base. The icecream itself was to die for, but you throw it into the banana milkshake and you have heaven right there in a glass.

The Name of the Star by Maureen Johnson

I accept and apologise that this post is late but I literally just finished reading this book,  and I can confirm, it is a drastic improvement from the last book I reviewed.

I read The Name of the Star in a matter of hours, because I simply could not put it down. I think I put it down five times, each time brief, and during those breaks (toilet, food, socializing with parents etc, the necessary stuff) the book and its contents barely left my brain. Needless to say, this is an astonishingly good read. It is entrancing, mortifying, funny, all the things a good book should be. I can't find one criticism on it. Not one, although I'm discounting 'it scared the living daylight out of me' as a negative point, because it just adds to the effect.

Blurb: "Louisiana teenager Rory Deveaux flies to London for the start of a new life at boarding school. But her arrival is overshadowed by a sudden outbreak of brutal murders, gruesome crimes mimicking the horrific work of Jack the Ripper. 'Rippermania' grabs hold of London, and the police are stumped with few leads and no witnesses. Except one. Rory has seen their prime suspect on the school grounds. But her friend Jazza didn't see anyone. So why could only Rory see him? And what is he planning to do next? In this edge-of-your-seat thriller, full of suspense and romance, Rory discovers the secrets of London and the truth about her own shocking abilities, as Jack the Ripper returns..."

It has every potential to be full of clichés, bad puns and tragic characters, but it has none of these. It's well and truly gripping, and at no point while reading it did I feel the need to groan and/or roll my eyes. The characters are new and interesting yet completely relatable, even if in unconventional ways. I found the viewpoint of an American teenager submerged in British culture to be hilarious in the most subtle aspects, and it is instantly obvious that a LOT of research went into this novel, seeing as the author is American herself.

The idea of Jack the Ripper is instantly chilling to anyone who has even heard of him, although I instantly relate the Ripper and this book to the Yorkshire Ripper, a figure I am much more familiar with. This also opened my eyes a little to the fact that terrible things can and do happens at completely unpredicted points in time and space, because there are maniacs out there. However this is not just about the Ripper. It's far more interesting than that. But I don't want to ruin it for you...

Look for The Name of the Star in Waterstones around World Book Day, and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. That is, unless you follow Maureen Johnson on Twitter, in which case you'll just be pleasant. I do advise that you follow MJ on Twitter, she's not that hard to find, but she's brilliant, in that she's completely insane and yet genius. I am not ashamed to admit that I stalk her a little on Twitter. I CAN'T HELP IT! She Tweets constantly and they never fail to be entertaining. Plus I don't think she minds... DFTBA.

Oh, and I rate this book as 9/10. I took off a mark because it scared me shitless.

The Abused Werewolf Rescue Group by Catherine Jinks

Although technically either the second or third book I've read in 2012, this wasn't the best start to my search for a great book.

"When Tobias Vandevelde wakes up in hospital with no memory of the night before, he is told that he was found unconscious. In a zoo pen. (naked, I might add.) The doctor rules out epilepsy and Toby's prank-loving friends are just as freaked out as he is. Then the wild-eyed Reuben turns up talking in hushed tones about Toby being a werewolf. Reuben's pale, insomniac friends seem equally convinced and offer to chain him up every full moon. They also claim to be part of some vampire support group. This has to be a joke - right? It's only when he's kidnapped, imprisoned and in desperate need of rescuing that Toby begins to believe them. Hamster-drinking Vampires, vulnerable werewolves and accidental zombies? Welcome to the bizarre world of the abused werewolf rescue group."

That is the ACTUAL blurb. I don't know if it's just me, but it sounds insane. It IS insane, by all accounts.

It's definitely a children's book, or at least early teens. It's not necessarily a bad book - it kept me entertained and engrossed at least a little, but it seems to me now that books on werewolves are over done, books on vampires are certainly even more over done, and although books on zombies aren't quite as popular, when you throw them into a book which already contains werewolves and vampires, it becomes a little too much.

Admittedly, the vampires and the zombies don't play a huge part in it until the last six chapters - around three quarters of the way through, in fact, but werewolves themselves aren't actually a huge feature either, aside from the issues they raise and the main character wondering whether he is or isn't a werewolf, a species which may or may not exist, and until half way through, nothing exciting happens at all. After this point, it's intriguing, but past a certain point, all of the characters and the species involved get confusing as they start merging and cross-breeding. When his mother re-enters the book, I almost wanted to stop reading because of how unbearably irritating I found her to be. Then right at the end, spoiler alert, the last chapter is the most clichéd, boring end to an otherwise bearable novel I have ever read. After Toby and his mother FINALLY accept that he may in fact be a werewolf, he plays it off as "yeah this is my life now, it's cool, I don't care about my friends any more" and then we see one of the two worst ways to end a book, one of which, the 'it was all a dream' ending, I must credit the author for not using. However, she did use the equally as terrible ending, the 'this is me talking into a voice recorder, and I'm going to have it published' scenario, as if this is not a terrible novel for children, but actually a "thinly disguised piece of non-fiction".

At the end of the book, the last few pages consists of an extract from a prequel or sequel (I can't tell) to this book, which I read two pages of before I became so mind-numbingly bored I wanted to chew my own face off.

My verdict? I would not read this again or recommend it for anyone who is not a twelve year old boy. It's not a bad book, it's just not a particularly good one either. Two stars. Full of clichés and bad stereotypes, it is not a good read for someone interested in werewolves. However, it will sit on my bookcase as part of my werewolf book collection which I am slowly forming.

Giving Up My Search

For the past two weeks or so, I've devoted a shocking amount of time to finding a particular Vlogbrothers video, or more specifically, the answer to one particular question. The question itself is more like instructions on how to do something that I'd convinced myself that I needed to do for so many reasons, but do you know what? I've given up. I don't need to do... that thing that I thought I needed to do. I'm not in such dire need of.. something.. that I'm going to waste a shockingly large amount of time, looking for the perfect way to word something so that I can finally do that thing that I really don't need to do.

So I'm not going to do it.

That's it.

I'm decided.

Not doing it.

Not searching, not wasting time, not wasting heart.

Nope.

Making Me Smile

Watch "Random Valentine; Condom Taping" on YouTube

I've missed two blog so far this week, but that's due to illness. Personally I don't think I deserve to be punished for those, but it's your call, I suppose.
When you're ill, it can sometimes take a lot to make you smile, so I knew I must be at least 50% better when the link to the video above made me giggle my socks off. I hope you enjoy it too, because damn, it's funny.

An Explanation (and a long post at last)

Sometimes in life there aren't many things that can make you truly happy. Things get you down, you get stressed, and you don't even have the time to attempt anything relaxing. So what do we do in these situations? Some people just get on with life, cope with it, carry their burdens and hope for a nirvana. Others become introverted hermit crabs and keep everything in, slowly becoming depressive as they refuse to share anything, and some just forget about everything, declare their lives to be shit and try to see the greener grass by just generally not giving a care to anything. Everyone has their own method which may or may not work for them, and I'm not going to stress a point on there because what works for some people doesn't for others. It's human nature to believe that your views are better than anybody else's and I'm not going to pretend that we all don't fall subject to that viewpoint now and again. We are all both right and wrong about our opinions, because opinions are just that. They aren't fact, but they're not complete rubbish either.

That said, I generally have three stages in my method for relieving stress or relaxing, and it does tend to work really well for me. There's never not something running through my mind, be it a song, a quote I'm deciphering or a conversation I've had or would like to have with someone, and sometimes it can all become something of a mess and I'd quite like it all to quieten down and focus on one solitary thing, or focus away from one thing in particular. First, I find something which could potentially take my mind off whatever I'm trying to think or not think about, and this thing is usually in the form of a video. Music and reading works too, but videos work better because they require more attention from my senses, and I find it hard to read and listen to music at the same time. Vlogs also work, but they tend to make me think even more and confuse me, and often make my head a mess, hence why this post is a little messy around the edges. This brings me neatly to my stage two; blogging. It doesn't actually have to be a blog post, writing stories or fanfiction work too, but blogging tends to be the process I lean towards, and a lot of the posts on here (this one included) exist solely as a result of me trying to take my mind off something. This stage is in effect, me clearing out my system by writing about  the thing that I need to stop thinking about in order to maintain what little sanity I have. I consider things deeply, debate them and try to decide on an opinion to form (which is basically what the first paragraph of this post is). This requires a lot of thinking and I can write and rewrite a point so many times in different ways, it's really quite fascinating to read it once I've gotten the worst of it out of my system. My third and final stage is basically stage one repeated, except it usually lasts a lot longer and I'll be more relaxed about it. If I ended stage one midway through a video then it could lead on directly from it, it's more than likely that I'm going to go back to it. Half of my screen right now is a Vlogbrothers video, paused 54 seconds from the end, because a thought entered my head so I watched something different and that combined with other activities led me to writing this, and I fully intend to go back to that video as soon as I'm finished with this, and not a moment sooner, because I'm in the right mindset now and I shall not distract myself. Vlogbrothers shal be my treat for finishing this post, but I'm not going to rush it.

It helps if the thing that I distract myself with is something that I'm very passionate about, and it bodes well for me that I get obsessed with things pretty easily.

I have been judged before for getting excited about things and obsessing over them, and I really do understand how that might be annoying, but what I don't get is when people say that I'm wasting my life by getting obsessed with things. Now I understand where they're coming from, and I'm not going to get all teenager-y and say that "it's my life and if I want to waste it who are you to stop me", and I'd rather you voiced your opinions on me rather than keeping them quiet and pretending that you like me when you really can't stand me, but when you tell me that I'm a weirdo for effectively being myself, and that you'd rather have a shitty life than be me ... well to be perfectly honest I'm a little offended. You don't have to like the things that I do or even pretend to, and I don't expect you to get excited about these little things. I don't particularly want to be any of you, either, because I'm happy with my life and as a general rule, I like who I am (I just hate some of the decisions I make). I just really can't fathom why people think that judging me and judging the things that make me who I am are different things, because when you do that, you're not discriminating the thing itself, because if you were that would be your opinion and that's fine, but when you call them shitty little things that I obsess over and let take over my life, although you may not realise it, they are a vital part of who I am. When I relax and try to take my mind off things, when I watch Vlogbrothers videos or scroll through Tumblr pages while listening to Simon and Garfunkel, I take it all in so I don't have to think about whatever is getting to me, and generally if I can't do that, I go downhill rapidly. I get angry and I get frustrated. You've seen me when I get like this and you know that it isn't fun for anybody involved. Little things make me happy. S&G make me smile, they give me hope in life and love and friendship. Nerdfighteria makes me happy; it gives me hope in humanity, and it gives me the confidence to be who I am. You may not realise it; you may see them only as things that I get excited over and talk about endlessly, but that's only because each obsessions starts when I'd rather think about that than something else. They make me seem insane sometimes, but really they're the reason that I have what little sanity I have. Truthfully? The reason I extended my blogging challenge into the new year was because I knew that if I didn't keep up my process of taking my mind of things, I'd slowly bring myself down into being a person who I really don't want to be, and nobody wants to spend time with. I knew that without these things, I'd end up snapping at people and saying things that I don't mean.

As I said before, you can disagree with me on this, because all opinions are believed to be fact by somebody. I don't expect you to suddenly change your mind about the things that I like, just accept that I do talk about them. You can tell me to shut up if it irritates you, in fact I encourage you to let me know when I get beyond irritating, and I'll be sure to return the favour. You can tell me when you don't care about whatever I'm rambling on about, and feel free to voice your opinion on it. But there's a line, dude.

Pfft.

S

It's your fault this time. :)

Day Four

Still no interesting post. Should I give up? Probably. Am I going to? No. Definitely not. I am many things but one thing that I am not is a quitter. I will see this through to the end, if it's the last thing I do.

Third

The third short blog in a row and I really am sorry. I would have done a long one tonight but my wrist is killing me and I'm tired out, emotionally and physically. Still, at least half-term starts tomorrow. Although it'll be a miracle if that goes by stress free.

My Apologies

This is the second last minute post in a row. I have a good one in planning which should be ready by tomorrow. I'll write it on the bus home, probably. I need to sleep now. Goodnight.

Tagged

This is really unusual for me. I mean this is just untouched ground. I kinda like it... But its so strange!

Sometimes Technology Infuriates Me

It really does. I don't know if it's a problem specific to my phone or if it's one which happens a lot with Androids, but it has a real temper when it comes to connecting to the internet. Sometimes it will manage it, other times it'll just cut out. I know the Internet is working fine becuase my phone refuses to connect right now and yet I'm able to post this from my iPod. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated...

I also don't see the point in having different keyboards on different devices! Switching between the Apple keyboard and the Android keyboard isn't usually so bad, until it comes to punctuation. The Android keyboard has a full-stop on the alphabet keyboard, as well as one on the first punctuation board, and the double tap space bar also works as a full-stop, but not quite as often as would be appreciated in comparison to the iPod keyboard. Then the basic punctuation (.,?!') is all shifted around, and the Android feels the need to have three boards for punctuation and emoticons which I never use because they look stupid, and it doesn't reset to the first board if you go back to text, which really winds me up. On the Apple keyboard, if you use an apostraphe, it automatically snaps back to the text board without you having to do it manually, which is really confusing when you go to the Android board and it's an extra tap which you don't even think about, so you end up with a few random punctuation marks in your sentence.

Then there's the autocorrect, which I really miss when I use my phone. I tend to make a lot of typos when I type, and where Android makes (mostly incorrect) suggestions as to what I might mean and makes me either choose or retype in an irritating and time consuming way, Apple just assumes, and at least if it doesn't get ot right (although it usually does for me) the things it does correct to are sometimes highly entertaining. Although, I still don't get why it feels the need to capitalise 'Reading'.

Even the letter select system is better on the iPod. If you make an error half way through a word on the iPod, you simply drag your finger through the word and settle on the right letter. You can highlight it easily, and whatever you do by this method comes up in a little magnifying glass type thing, so it's really clear what you're doing, and everything is focused. However on the Android, it's a hit and miss process. You need to use a single tap to get as close to the letter as possible, and then erase around it. It hardly ever works properly, if it's near the edge of the screen then it often clicks on something different, and it's just alltogether a really awful system.

Don't get me wrong, I love my phone. I just wish it wasn't so damn awkward.

The YouTube.

I love YouTube. It's probably the website I spend the most time on, since I stopped looking for new Fanfictions, and hardly anyone updates the ones I actually read. I guess the thing about YouTube is that it's so diverse in its content that there is something on there for everyone, and once you find something you like, you can just keep going and going and going through links until you reach that weird part of YouTube... You know the weird part of YouTube, where you're watching people having tattoos done and random body parts pierced, or where naked men dance on the beach with bananas, or a 24 hour loop of a seemingly random man humping a giant fish sculpture.

The internet is brilliant.

My personal favourite part of YouTube is the vloggers, my preferred ones being (in no particular order) Charlieissocoollike, (epic) Nerimon, (epic) Littleradge, (sexy) the Vlogbrothers, (made of awesome, nerdfightastic) Shane Dawson, (brilliant) Jory Caron, (not bad) Riley McIlwain, (not bad) Jon Paula,(truthful  news/entertainment)  JenxthexJinx, (amazing, hilarious) EddPlant, (fairly decent music and entertaining) GradualReport, (genius hilarity <3)  jackisanerd, (strangely brilliant) jacksfilms, (even better) Tobuscus, (better still) TobyTurner, (a little long, still epic) TouchTheSkyFilms, (so amazing <3) Khyan1, (weirdly epic)  Danisnotonfire, (funny and nice ;D)  owlssayhoot, (interesting) amazingphil, (awesome)  Ssondiyazi (brilliant :D)... I've just realised how long the list actually is, and these are just vloggers. These should all be linked, by the way, and they're all awesome in their own light.


This post was going to be longer, but I'm tired.

Credit must go to Becca today, who lent me use of the word 'diverse' for this post.

I'm Not Generally a Baby Person...

... but damn, Caitlin is CUTE. Well, all of my little cousins are cute, but I'm only just noticing the extent of their cuteness now, as opposed to when I was eight when Lucy was born, and I wasn't really interested in babies.

I love all of my cousins to bits, the older ones and the younger ones, but it's only in the past year or so that I've actually started thinking of babies as any more than lovable loud and smelly things. I guess it's hormones, but it's definitely not to the point where I actually WANT a baby. After all, they are still loud and everything, and they all go through a stage where they look a bit like Slitheen.

Idiots

Some people really get on my nerves. It's usually the people who are idiots just for the sake of irritating others to amuse their friends. I know why they do it; they think it's funny. They don't give a shit about the people they irritate, because they think that it's completely normal. They think that it isn't causing any harm whatsoever, because to them, someone's anger or embarrassment or pain in humorous. Not once do they ever stop and think "hey, is this a bad thing?" because do you know what? They are fucking idiots.

The most common example of this is something that I see literally every day in school. Person A likes to read on the computer. She is, by all accounts a lovely girl. She never says a bad word about anyone and I really love her for being who she is, despite being bullied. She's a little on the irritating side but she's a great friend and I'm ashamed to admit that I haven't been the best friend to her that I could have been. But anyway, person A likes to keep herself to herself in a morning, and she sits in the corner on a computer, reading. Of course, our school is filled with idiots. Idiots who can't even leave her alone, when she isn't doing anything wrong at all. For some reason, they feel the need to stand directly behind her with their heads almost touching her shoulders, clearly invading her personal space. Something else I should mention about person A is that she has a very short temper, and isn't afraid to lash out at those who irritate her. So person B is standing behind person A, often with persons C, D and E stood behind him to back up his irritating persona. He then finds it necessary to talk to her in short and repetitive phrases like; "what are you reading? What are you reading? What are you reading?" until at last person A snaps, and shouts at them in an unfortunately undignified voice to go away and leave her alone. For some reason, this response is seen as entertaining by the posse of idiots, who then walk off laughing their pompous little heads off, leaving person A very angry, distressed and shaken up. I'm sorry, but I don't see the entertainment factor in this. In fact, I find it disturbing and mean.

The next example is something which irritates me to no end. People, typically boys, who go around telling everyone that one of their friends likes you. It's clearly not true, because you've said the same thing to every girl in the year, and apparently the words "fuck off" mean nothing any more, and are also, apparently, entertaining. Again, I don't see the entertainment in being persistently annoying.

It's a common occurrence at lunch times that two or three people will pull themselves away from our group to have conversation, debate or discussion in private. These conversations are easy to spot even by the most idiotic students in school. We tend to keep our heads down, spend a fair amount of time hugging, and don't spend a lot of time with smiles on our faces, hence the need to be having a private conversation. It seems that there are some ridiculously stupid people in our year who see us drifting away from our usual group and think "ooh, they must want us to come and irritate them," which they do happily, leaving their own group of people we never talk to, just to come and ruin our conversation. Then when we kindly ask them to leave us alone (which apparently needs to be done repeatedly), they don't understand the meaning of it, and instead ask us stupid questions (see above) and crowd around us. They then go in search of the response the get from person A, which they know they're going to get because they're being fucking annoying enough. Sure enough, it doesn't take long before we're restraining ourselves from hitting the ring leader and shouting at them to fuck off, because we're really not having a good day and despite how irritating it is that they find it amusing, it seems to work, because they're really just cowards who can't go up against a couple of girls in a fight. I never really thought of myself as a fighter, being the stupidly calm yet clumsy person I am, but if they do that again, I'm not going to argue when a part of my brain tells me to punch them.

They do it because they're bored. "Was I bored? No, I wasn't fuckin' bored. I'm never bored. That's the trouble with everybody - you're all so bored. You've had nature explained to you and you're bored with it, you've had the living body explained to you and you're bored with it, you've had the universe explained to you and you're bored with it, so now you want cheap thrills and, like, plenty of them, and it doesn't matter how tawdry or vacuous they are as long as it's new as long as it's new as long as it flashes and fuckin' bleeps in forty fuckin' different colors. So whatever else you can say about me, I'm not fuckin' bored."


Idiots.